Happy Kick the Crap Outta Someone Day!

I was standing at the coffee bar this morning, waiting in line patiently for my java, and admiring the Cinco de Mayo decorations. I thought it was rather festive and a great way to start the day.

A woman behind me said, “Why did he decorate? Do the people in Mexico celebrate the Fourth of July?”

I wanted to turn to her and say, “Have you been living in a cave? Did your parents home-school you and the other 28 children in the compound at the same time? If your stumpy brain could even think to Google it, you would find out the it's not Mexican Independence Day. We remember it because Mexicans kicked the crap out of French. Anytime someone kicks the crap out of the French is a day worth celebrating.

"No Hot Tamales for you, Retard.”

God, can’t some people just celebrate the culture and not overanalyze it to death? Apparently not. I wonder if she gets irate about St. Paddy’s Day, too.

Stupid people.

This makes me sick. Sick sick sick. There’s the Death Penalty for a reason, and this woman is it.

Favorite statement of the day: To me, after giving one of my co-workers a sincere compliment, "Ok, now I feel bad for starting those vicious rumors that you are a man-hungry psycho vixen."

Don't worry. Tomorrow is Friday.