Friday, February 27, 2004

Rosie, Oh Rosie...
My Current Mood: The current mood of crimsondove at

Time for me to weigh in on the O'Donnell/Carpenter nuptials.

First, congratulations to them for having the means, and the publicity, to draw such attention to their marriage in San Fran. I think it's awesome. They, along with 3,00-plus other couple are doing what the rest of the nations gays and lesbians are dying to do right now. Even a city in New York is jumping in and declaring war against their state and issuing marriage licenses. Hopeful. I am very hopeful.

But it made me quite melancholy.

I wasn't expecting to cry when I saw this picture. Truly. Beside the fact that I don't care for Rosie very much, the envisionment of her and her wife kissing as a married couple made me tear up. Why?

Because it is what every lesbian and gay couple should be allowed to do.

Don't get me wrong. I loved my wedding. It was beautiful, poignant and breathtaking. But, let's get honest here. It wasn't real. It was as real as we could make it, and it doesn't change my level of devotion and committment to Lindi in the eyes of God and our family and friends. But it's not real. It's not a marriage. It's two devoted women living as a married couple. And I guess that will have to do for now.

I want to be able to point to Lindi and tell everyone that she is my wife, and have no one doubt the sanctity of that word. I want to be able to confide in her, and evoke spousal priveldge. I want her to be with me and me with her in the hospital, on our death beds and in our final arrangements. I want to do everything with her. I want her to be the mother of my child, be recognized for it, and not the "guardian" listed in my will. It's so simple that even the Republicans don't get it.

It's not about sex. It never has been. I'll have sex with or without the government's permission. It's about my life and who I choose to share it with.

I am jealous of Rosie O'Donnell. And I am proud.


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